Dear Amy: A 50-year-old woman wrote to Amy seeking advice about her long history of failed relationships, including experiences with controlling and emotionally abusive partners during her 20s and 30s. The woman shared her concerns about being overly cautious with potential partners, often ending things after the second or third date due to red flags such as rudeness, badmouthing, or coming on too strong.
Amy reassured the woman that her concerns were valid dealbreakers, encouraging her to trust her instincts and not overlook disrespectful behavior. She also suggested that the woman should consider examining her reaction to being corrected by others, while also acknowledging that discernment is a valuable quality.
In addition to providing advice, Amy urged the woman to work on becoming more open and relaxed during initial meetings, as first impressions can sometimes be misleading. However, she emphasized the importance of not overlooking rude or unkind behavior, reminding the woman of Maya Angelou’s words: “When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.”
As a final note, Amy provided her contact information for the woman to reach out for further advice or follow-up questions. She also mentioned that the column was distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC without directly mentioning any specific news organization.
The individual expressed appreciation for Amy’s advice and took note of the importance of balancing discernment with openness in her future interactions.